In today Purpose Driven Life daily devotional Rick Warren talks about guarding your children's spiritual growth....
In bible, I quote: " Nurture, guard, and guide the flock of God that is your responsibility... Not domineering as arrogant, dictatorial and overbearing persons... but being examples, patterns, and models of Christian living" (1 Peter 5:2-3 AMP) That actually in the context of Jesus protected the disciples' spirits...
So from disciples, what does that mean for the children? It is we as father to our children should protect their dignity, their self-esteem, and their spirit... You realize the power of our words - that our words can heal or hurt! We say, "sticks and stones may break my bones but names can never hurt me." It sound right don't it? But it is wrong as Names hurt the children more than sticks and stones. As a child can break a leg or arm and it will heal, but some wound that cause by the words of their father will still not heal up till the grown up. Example, some parents always said this to their child, "You're never going to amount to anything" This cause the child to continue to prove the parent wrong and they are still reacting to life instead of acting towards it.
As a father, we must always understand the power of our words. It does make a huge difference in healing or hurting the child. A dad can crush his daughter with one sentence; or he can build up his daughter. the same it goes with sons. John Eldridge, in his book, Wild at Heart, says "most men go through life reacting to what I often called 'the father wound.' Every boy as he grows up, want to have his manhood affirmed and the most important person to affirm is his dad". If he doesn't get it there, he tries to get his manhood affirmed in dozens of other ways. He basically live his entire lifetrying to compensate for something his dad never said. Just like a simple You're Okay, son or You're a man, or You're right... some simple affirmation or agreement can make a huge difference.
It is really serious on how we speak to our children... any words that we choose suppose to think first. In Jewish society, the father actually created a way of exploring creative thinking for their children. How they teach their child through very creative way... will blog about that in another post... but overall the whole idea is Break the Will but not breaking the spirit...
Thats what a parent should do... choose and protect the children spiritual growth.
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